Thursday, April 15, 2010

What makes the perfect wife?

Since the day we got married, I've been constantly questioning myself this. What makes the perfect wife? If I did that, would that make me a better wife? If I did this, would he love me more? If I do this everyday for him, would it improve our relationship, and give us more time to spend together? I've been at this for months on end. We've been married for 7 months now. And I'm still trying at it, improving and trying to get better. I've come to the stage where I could practically breeze thru making breakfast for him every morning, packing his lunchboxes, planning a meal just by opening a fridge.

Household chores? Dishwashing, toilet cleaning, laundry, they no longer challenge me. Probably a couple of years back, i was totally clueless about anything household. I was never one who helped out in household stuff. Well, not until I started dating him, and tried to impress his family with my helpfulness. Throughout staying with his family for the last 7 years, I've come to learn some house cleaning, and stuff. But not much since they got a maid in the house to look after Alfie, the family dog.


While i used to think that trying to impress the in laws were already a challenge to me, nothing beats having your own house with him alone. Nothing beats, him working all day, leaving you alone at home to deal with the house. One on one. Nothing beats having no maids here to clean for you. Everything is DIY. Nothing beats coming home hungry, and still having to cook for yourselves. Nothing beats having a husband to come home nagging at you for not cleaning well. But hey! Was i brought here to clean up after you? Was I brought here to look after your house, so you didn't have to? The singles are doing the same job as you, and they manage their house well too. So why can't you?

Then again, it dawned on me. The ideal wife of Singaporean men, or maybe every men. They just want a wife to look after them, to do things for them. They want to come home, to a place they can call home, feel home, smell home. A single friend told me that he could very well live on his own and do things on his own, and why is it my husband seem to depend on me so much? Wasn't women meant to be pampered?

Women ARE meant to be pampered, as much as men liked being pampered. In my situation now though, the MAN is bringing home the dough. And me, being home all day, gets the duties of a housewife. I overlook the whole house.

I can tell you, the standard that men set for their home, is not at all low. They tend to want their own home, very much to the standard their parents had when in their own home, without the things they hated whilst living in their parent's house. And this keeps continuing. Each one, getting more perfectionist than the previous. It really comes to a point where the wives breakdown, the hard work doesn't seem to pay off as the constant nagging still hits. Quarrels arise.. Relationship problems arise. Men find the woman no longer satisfy the criteria of being a wife, and goes out to find someone better. Divorce hits. And the cycle continues.

When does this ever come to an end? I am probably at the stage whereby, I'm still happily married. I still enjoy everyday with love from him. We're a happy couple. But the nagging doesn't stop.. And I'm trying my hardest to maintain this house. Its been 4 months we're here. Its been 3 months in this house. I admit there are some stuff I should have done earlier, but I've been lazy. We had an argument today.

I have been thinking about adopting a pet dog for long time now. From being in Singapore till now. I've kept all kinds of animals before. Rabbits, rats, hamsters, tortoises, guinea pigs, chickens. You name it I've had it. I loved the idea of giving love to an animal who deserved it but never had it before. For most of my pets, they're adopted. Injured, unloved, uncared for. I wanted a dog since young, but my parents never liked the idea. So now that we got our home, we've finally settled down in this country so far away from "home", i thought we would be ready for a new addition to our house.

Apparently, he thought we weren't ready. He said we're still too lazy to clean up after ourselves. The house is still not in the condition he expects it to be. That we still have alot of improvements to make. In terms of financially and household. That if our lifestyles improved, and become more settled in, that if the house remains clean and everything is in order to his liking, we could consider getting a pet. I took it personal. It was as though telling me, I haven't been doing a good job as a housewife. So really, what makes the perfect wife?

I have been thinking it through. After the conversation, I was really down. I didn't know how then I could make him happy. What else i need to do to make him happy? Everyday i try my best. I sleep an hour later to make sure his lunch box is all ready for the next work day. I wake up earlier to make breakfast for him so he could fill his stomach to go work and do his best. I do the laundry, clean the dishes, stoves, toilets, prepare the meals, so he could come home happy and play his games so he doesn't have to do anything.

Probably I wasn't organized enough. Maybe that's what that's making me feel hectic everyday trying to catch up with the household chores and maintaining the house. He went to bed early, and i've spent the time trying to search how to organize myself such that my days are not hectic but the home is in order. I needed badly to declutter my life, to set myself in order, to organize it such that I can do everything, and still stay sane.

I've learnt to do up a household organiser file. And that's what i've set myself up to do tomorrow. I will wake up do my chores, and plan my daily, weekly, and monthly to do. I will do my menu planning, my chores planning, and grocery shopping. I will do up my household organiser, and do my goal setting, holiday planning. And hopefully in time to come, everything can come into place, and I will gain back his trust, that I'm the best choice he ever made for himself. I love him and I truly do. And I will not let little things like this, tear me apart or spoil the wonderful relationship we have built between ourselves.

Maybe, and hopefully till then, I will be able to adopt our buddy dog, and in time to come, have a little baby in addition to our family.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Step conversion chart.






 Step Conversion Chart For example, high impact aerobics for 30 minutes equals 6,090 steps (30 x 203 = 6,090).

2,000 steps equal one mile.
Activity Steps/Min (Avg)
| Bicycling |
Bicycling (leisurely, 10-11.9 mph)100
Bicycling (moderate, 12-13.9 mph)200
Bicycling (vigorous, 14-15.9 mph)250
| Top |
| Dancing |
Aerobic dancing, low impact118
Aerobic dancing, strenuously140
Dancing, choreographed158
Dancing, socially93
Line Dancing139
| Top |
| Gym Activities |
Aerobics (high impact)182
Aerobics (low impact)125
Aerobics (moderate)154
Basketball, game230
Basketball, playing recreational138
Boxing, in a ring competitively213
Boxing, non-competitive131
Circuit Training178
Elliptical trainer203
Gymnastics89
Handball, recreational142
Judo187
Jumping Rope, moderate/fast244
Jumping Rope, slow178
Karate290
Kickboxing290
Pilates101
Racquetball138
Racquetball, playing competitively198
Rowing, light 111
Rowing, moderate 179
Rowing, vigorous effort203
Softball145
Stair climbing, moderate180
Stair climbing, slow 90
Stair climbing, vigorous 267
Stretching6
Swimming, leisure 133
Swimming, moderate effort174
Swimming, treading water49
Swimming, vigorous effort222
Tae Kwon Do290
Tai Chi8
Water Aerobics100
Weight lifting, light 66
Weight lifting, moderate 87
Weight lifting, vigorous133
Yoga100
| Top |
| Household Activities |
Grocery Shopping67
Housework, light 72
Housework, mopping floors51
Housework, vacuuming 101
Housework, washing windows 87
Painting/papering78
Washing the car87
| Top |
| Lawn and Garden |
Firewood, chopping133
Firewood, sawing113
Firewood, stacking89
Gardening, heavy174
Gardening, light 73
Gardening, moderate116
Hoeing in a garden96
Mowing160
Raking leaves 125
Yard Work, general145
| Top |
| Miscellaneous |
Badminton98
Billiards77
Bowling87
Fishing, from boat, sitting56
Fishing, from river bank and walking111
Frisbee, general playing67
Grocery Shopping67
Horseback riding, trotting102
Horseback riding, walking leisurely31
In-line skating, moderately125
Jumping Rope, moderate/fast244
Jumping Rope, slow178
Mowing160
Orienteering151
Painting/papering78
Pilates101
Raking leaves 125
Rollerblading, moderately125
Shoveling snow, heavy278
Shoveling snow, light133
Shoveling snow, moderate174
Tae Kwon Do290
Tai Chi8
Washing the car87
Yoga100
| Top |
| Outdoor Activities |
Badminton100
Baseball111
Basketball, game230
Basketball, playing recreational138
Bicycling (leisurely, 10-11.9 mph)100
Bicycling (moderate, 12-13.9 mph)200
Bicycling (vigorous, 14-15.9 mph)250
Canoeing, leisurely100
Firewood, chopping133
Firewood, sawing113
Firewood, stacking89
Fishing, from boat, sitting56
Fishing, from river bank and walking111
Frisbee, general playing67
Gardening, heavy174
Gardening, light 73
Gardening, moderate116
Golfing, with a cart78
Golfing, without a cart 122
Hiking, 10-20 lb. load 217
Hiking, 21-42 lb. load 232
Hiking, general172
Horseback riding, trotting102
Horseback riding, walking leisurely31
In-line skating, moderately125
Mowing160
Orienteering151
Rollerblading, moderately125
Running a 6 minute mile247
Running a 7 minute mile222
Running a 8 minute mile200
Running a 9 minute mile184
Running, jogging156
Shoveling snow, heavy278
Shoveling snow, light133
Shoveling snow, moderate174
Skiing, cross-country moderately164
Skiing, cross-country rapidly256
Skiing, cross-country slowly114
Skiing, downhill moderate178
Skiing, downhill rapidly244
Skiing, downhill slowly109
Snowboarding, light 150
Snowboarding, moderate 182
Snowshoeing178
Soccer, playing competitively218
Soccer, recreational144
Softball145
Tennis, doubles102
Tennis, singles178
Volleyball, game 232
Volleyball, leisure 87
Walking at a normal pace100
Washing the car87
| Top |
| Running |
Running a 6 minute mile247
Running a 7 minute mile222
Running a 8 minute mile200
Running a 9 minute mile184
Running, jogging156
Walking at a normal pace100
| Top |
| Sports & Games |
Badminton98
Baseball111
Basketball, game230
Basketball, playing recreational138
Billiards77
Bowling87
Boxing, in a ring competitively213
Boxing, non-competitive131
Cricket111
Fencing133
Football189
Golfing, with a cart78
Golfing, without a cart 122
Gymnastics89
Handball, recreational142
Hockey178
Ice skating, competitively162
Ice skating, leisurely84
Ice skating, moderately122
Judo187
Karate290
Kickboxing290
Racquetball138
Racquetball, playing competitively198
Scuba diving203
Skiing, cross-country moderately164
Skiing, cross-country rapidly256
Skiing, cross-country slowly114
Skiing, downhill moderate178
Skiing, downhill rapidly244
Skiing, downhill slowly109
Snowboarding, light 150
Snowboarding, moderate 182
Soccer, playing competitively218
Soccer, recreational144
Softball145
Squash348
Tae Kwon Do290
Tai Chi8
Tennis, doubles102
Tennis, singles178
Volleyball, game 232
Volleyball, leisure 87
Water Polo222
Yoga100
| Top |
| Walking |
Golfing, with a cart78
Golfing, without a cart 122
Grocery Shopping67
Hiking, 10-20 lb. load 217
Hiking, 21-42 lb. load 232
Hiking, general172
Orienteering151
Running, jogging156
Snowshoeing178
Stair climbing, moderate180
Stair climbing, slow 90
Stair climbing, vigorous 267
Walking at a normal pace100
| Top |
| Water |
Canoeing, leisurely100
Rowing, light 111
Rowing, moderate 179
Rowing, vigorous effort203
Scuba diving203
Swimming, leisure 133
Swimming, moderate effort174
Swimming, treading water49
Swimming, vigorous effort222
Water Aerobics100
Water Polo222
Water Skiing104
| Top |
| Winter |
Curling89
Hockey178
Ice skating, competitively162
Ice skating, leisurely84
Ice skating, moderately122
Shoveling snow, heavy278
Shoveling snow, light133
Shoveling snow, moderate174
Skiing, cross-country moderately164
Skiing, cross-country rapidly256
Skiing, cross-country slowly114
Skiing, downhill moderate178
Skiing, downhill rapidly244
Skiing, downhill slowly109
Snowboarding, light 150
Snowboarding, moderate 182
Snowshoeing178 

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Break your limits, unleash yourself..

You can bet there will be more blogging coming up. I really want to share the photos we have took on our road trips and our life here. Be it to family or friends..

I want to share our travel road trips and our experience living in another country outside our own..


But at this moment, here's a touching video I want to share with everyone..
  
Limitations are set by yourself. Push your limits to achieve higher than you thought u can. You can fail 100 times but if u succeed that 1 time, u still succeed. Love this video. Too inspirational. Watch it and understand why.. I hope it changes your perception the way it did for me.